marcus aurelius

Optimism

FrostyLeave a comment

Optimism

I am a glass half-full type of person. I strongly believe such an attitude can be developed internally. Such a positive outlook on life is contagious. It is one of those things that compounds over time, so the sooner this is developed the better.

Here are some simple habits and reminders that can help on stay optimistic.

Find Your Anchor

anchor.jpg

You anchor is something that grounds you. It is what keeps you real, what keeps you motivated and on course. You truly enjoy doing this. When you accomplish your daily anchor, all is good in the world and nothing can bring you down.

Dwayne Johnson, aka “The Rock”, says his anchor is working out every day. He likes to get up early in the morning – when the things you need to do during the day have not yet started distracting him – and go through his exercise routine.

It doesn’t even have to be some thing physical like exercise, running, swimming, etc. It can be as simple as meditation, journaling, relaxing in the sun, making your bed, whatever. The key is to use this activity as an anchor and truly believe that accomplishing this will mean you will conquer your day.

Protect your anchor.

Be Fearless

Be optimistic about each day, be adventurous, be open to the universe by saying YES. Be fearless – do one thing every day that puts you out of your comfort zone and scares you. Start with small things and work your way up. Develop the courage to ask for things that you would otherwise be shy of. Of course, don’t jump off a bridge.

A couple of awesome short audios you can listen to every morning to help with this:

 

Marcus Aurelius’ morning meditation

Be Prepared

Captain Chris Hadfield, the famous Canadian astronaut, describes the preparations required for every mission and how that has changed his approach to life. He describes this wonderfully in his book.

The idea is to be prepared for the worst but hope for the best. Always have a plan B for every mission.

Know Your Weaknesses

As you will implement some new habits in your daily routine, you will have a feeling of what works and what does not. Be ready to experiment with this. Know your weaknesses and be realistic. Set goals and systems that you can achieve and be able to implement.

The worst thing that can happen is you set a ridiculous goal and never achieve it, get dishearten and lose momentum. Then you need to start from scratch again.

Know what works for you.

Careful with Your Friends

We are the sum average of the 5 people we hang out with. This is a rule. The people you inspire to be will be where you end up. So just be careful who your friends are.

 

A very simple rule to live by is:

“I want to leave the world in a better place than how I found it.”

Don’t Let Things External to You Bother You

FrostyLeave a comment

Don't Let Things External to You Bother You

Invictus by William Ernest Henley, is an inspiring poem. It is a little depressing, but the bits that I like are towards the end:

…I am the master of my fate, I am the captain of my soul…

I read somewhere that the secret to being happy is realizing that you have very little control. Little control on how others think, how others behave. And no control on how the universe unfolds. Therefore, I try not to let things external to me bother me.

Things Internal

I do care about things internal. Care a lot about things internal. I control my thoughts. These become my habits. Which becomes my personality. Internal things are easy to control. This attitude prevents ego-inflation. And besides, if I focus on personal corrections and growth, there is little time to bother with what others have to say or think.

Past Mistakes

The best thing about making a mistake is that all you have to do in order to move on, is to allow time to pass. Mistakes happen. The “Hakuna Matata!” philosophy applies well here.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xB5ceAruYrI

Make mistakes and take the “Kaizen” approach: incremental improvements by monitoring and tracking your mistakes. Do what you have to do in order to move forward. Without mistakes there would be no evolution.

Regrets

The worst thing that can happen in life, is a regret. Don’t be in a situation where “you wish you had done that”. Have a “go for it” attitude with every opportunity. Especially when you are young. The principle of compounding is in your favor, and you cannot afford not to go for it.

You miss every shot you do not take

Victim Mentality

The worst disease is that of the mind. Believe that you are in control of your decisions, and yours only. Life is complicated, with a lot of moving parts. Others are not “out to get you”. People act in their best interest and not everyone’s state of consciousness is at the same level (more on this below).

One way to not fall for this trap, is to keep your mind occupied. An unoccupied mind wanders and looks for faults with others. Be an observer of the world, be curious, travel, communicate, think. Keep a positive energy that radiates all around you and is a beacon for others. If you let it, the victim mind set will consume you, rotting from within. Not only affecting you, but the people you love.

States of Consciousness

There are excellent articles written on this topic, and the idea is more akin to spirituality. I am interested in the practical aspects of this. You can read the full article here, but I will summarize it very briefly. Consciousness has stages, and you work up the steps to a higher state of consciousness.

  • Life Happens “To Me”: this is the victim mindset mentioned above. Everyone is out to get me, and I don’t understand why.
  • Life Happens “By Me”: I am in control of my decisions and actions. In control of my thoughts. I choose all the good things that happen to me, as well as all the bad things.
  • Life Happens “Through Me”: I am so in-tune with the universe, that without putting any effort, the universe delivers in my favor.
  • Life Happens “As Me”: to be honest, I am not entirely sure what this one is about, but I guess at this stage of consciousness, there is not separation of “me” and “the universe”, we are all one.

Everyone starts at the first stage, and has to evolve up to the higher ones. It is our responsibility to realize these stages, realize where we are and work our way up, and realize where the other person is and help him do the same – do not argue and do not ignore.

Empathy

Empathy goes a long way. I always thought empathy was listening to the other person’s problem and offering a solution. While this is correct in the sense the final step is to offer a solution, but there is one crucial step in between. And that is to just listen and empathize. Try to, try hard to, put yourself in their shoes and see the situation through their eyes. Then agree that it is a difficult situation to be in. Agree that it really sucks. Once you are in sync, then you are qualified to offer a solution. A genuine hug will do all this in a hugely efficient manner. Leverage a “crisis” situation as an opportunity for growth and consolidation.

I will end with an awesome quote to tie everything together:

“When you wake up in the morning, tell yourself: the people I deal with today will be meddling, ungrateful, arrogant, dishonest, jealous and surly. They are like this because they can’t tell good from evil. But I have seen the beauty of good, and the ugliness of evil, and have recognized that the wrongdoer has a nature related to my own – not of the same blood and birth, but the same mind, and possessing a share of the divine. And so none of them can hurt me. No one can implicate me in ugliness. Nor can I feel angry at my relative, or hate him. We were born to work together like feet, hands and eyes, like the two rows of teeth, upper and lower. To obstruct each other is unnatural. To feel anger at someone, to turn your back on him: these are unnatural.”

-Marcus Aurelius, Meditations